"I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. " Fred Allen

Things are changing too darn fast around my house...


I'm constantly joking about the three daughters getting jobs, getting their own place and visiting every week...or so. Truth is, I joke about it to hopefully ease the hurt of the eventuality of that reality.

My oldest is driving, working and getting information from perspective colleges in the mail all since the arrival of the new year. Seems like just yesterday the picture on our refrigerator was snapped of me taking her to kindergarten her first day of school...

I'm the only male grandchild in my paternal grandfather's line with children. Our family name will go with me to my grave...or urn... since they are all girls. Not long ago, the three of them were together in the living room, and I called a impromptu family meeting:

Tony C:  Listen girls. Two things. First, one of you will be keeping your last name when you get
              married. Period.
              Second, somebody will get the $5,000 elopement prize. When it's your turn to marry, you
              elope and get 5 large. Teenager, don't see that deal in your future since you'll be the first.
              Crazy  Tomato and Bulldog, work it out amongst yourselves and let me know at least 24
              hours in  advance.

Teenager: That stinks! I want the money, and I'm changing my name too! That's dumb dad!

Crazy Tomato: Why do we have to change our names? I just learned to spell my last name. Mom!

Bulldog: (blowing kisses) Bye! Bye, bye, bye...

Okay. Maybe it's a little early in the game for family meetings. But, I never underestimate the importance of communication in the dad/daughter dynamic regardless of age, since the window of reception is so small. You never know when those 27 minutes of complete acceptance might occur from birth to walking down the aisle with your daughter...or driving to City Hall if that's in their cards.

The thing that bothers me the most when the day does finally comes that all of the chicks are gone from the nest is... exactly what will I do for entertainment? Sure, it will be nice to go to the bathroom in peace, watch what I want (and when) on the big TV or jump in the car for an excursion at will.

Wait...was there a counterpoint?

Entertainment! That's right. I'm constantly entertained at the expense of my three girls. From dumb comments like it's 30 past referring to the time by the teenager to the Crazy Tomato lining up Cheezits through the hallway trying to lead the Bulldog to her playhouse in the backroom, I'm constantly in stitches at the house from all the shenanigans. What will replace that?

Mrs. Tony C might be in a lot of trouble when that day finally comes...and all my focus moves to her. Might behoove her to start suggesting hobbies to yours truly.